the art of relationship
its not uncommon for us as humans to assess what works and what doesn't work in a relationship, especially when the relationship is not our own. With friends and family as a steady influence in our lives, they can show us our true selves though often candidly, and are quick to point out our mistakes. While I have not been IN a "relationship" myself for a great many years, I have spent time not only observing others in their happiness (or unhappiness) but building my own database of conventional wisdom with unconventional style. What I've picked up on the most is that the suffering endured in many relationships is not actually caused by the relationship itself, but rather the attitudes, insecurity, and expectations of the people involved. Just the other day someone told me he didn't want to get into a relationship because he wanted to spend some time enjoying the things he likes to do, and being with friends and family. While overlooking the La Jolla coast at sunset with the sun beautifully reflecting on the water, I reflected on the nuances of his statement. This perspective is absolutely ridiculous, because you should be able to FULLY enjoy your life and being with your friends and family REGARDLESS of whether you are in a relationship. If you can't, your relationship is NOT HEALTHY. Nobody has the right to keep you from the people or things you enjoy - your friends don't do this, they respect you for who you are.
As a free-spirited Scorpio, independent, creative, spiritual, yet passionate, dedicated and understanding, I have the capacity to appreciate the beauty in each relationship I encounter. While many of these traits are innate, each person must also do their part to connect with their strengths and weaknesses, in order to find balance in all aspects of life. The downfall of being a strong Scorpio is that I crave perfection which can lead to disappointment (if expectations are present), and have likewise been accused of "thinking I know everything" - whether because of my intense personality or my two Master's Degrees. This is something God has been working with me on over the years, and I am so thankful that He has continued to humble me more and more each day, until I reach the place the place He wants me to be - His perfection, his perfect peace. I can go as far as saying that He literally took me out of my comfort zone (life as I knew it) and physically put me on the other side of the world in order that I might learn some valuable lessons about life.
while i was in Greece, I took some leisure time to read "The Mastery of Love" by Don Miguel Ruiz. It might sound cheesy, but pick up a copy and you'll see that what I'm talking about here is almost a no-brainer. I had read this book before, maybe 5 or 6 years ago thinking it would help me get over all the failed relationship attempts. After that time however I kept falling into the same patterns, like the same old crap only with different guys. About 2 years ago I decided to start practicing absinence, in correlation with my renewed faith and dedication to God, and of course in response to repeatedly failed relationship attempts. Since this time I have been able to focus on myself as an individual, reflecting on many areas of my life and how to improve them through a renewed thankful and positive attitude towards nearly everyone I encountered.
Regardless of whether you are in a relationship, you must never lose sight of yourself as an individual or stop doing the things you enjoy, that make you who you are. Likewise you must respect your partner (the same goes for friends and family) to allow them to continue to be themselves without constricting their lifestyles. Except of course if they are involved in anything illegal or leading to acts of infidelity, but this may also be a reflection of their dissatisfaction with your expectations. To try and change or control another person or project past relationship hurts onto them does not work, it only leads to more hurt. This is the key to mastering the art of relationship, and maintaining a healthy balanced life. Enter each new relationship with a positive attitude of appreciation and keep your communication open and honest, so as to not be haunted by past ghosts - that probably don't have anything to do with the new person anyway! We can only learn and become stronger from our past mistakes, and move forward in perfect peace towards a positive future. After all, you deserve the BEST, forget about the rest.
As a free-spirited Scorpio, independent, creative, spiritual, yet passionate, dedicated and understanding, I have the capacity to appreciate the beauty in each relationship I encounter. While many of these traits are innate, each person must also do their part to connect with their strengths and weaknesses, in order to find balance in all aspects of life. The downfall of being a strong Scorpio is that I crave perfection which can lead to disappointment (if expectations are present), and have likewise been accused of "thinking I know everything" - whether because of my intense personality or my two Master's Degrees. This is something God has been working with me on over the years, and I am so thankful that He has continued to humble me more and more each day, until I reach the place the place He wants me to be - His perfection, his perfect peace. I can go as far as saying that He literally took me out of my comfort zone (life as I knew it) and physically put me on the other side of the world in order that I might learn some valuable lessons about life.
while i was in Greece, I took some leisure time to read "The Mastery of Love" by Don Miguel Ruiz. It might sound cheesy, but pick up a copy and you'll see that what I'm talking about here is almost a no-brainer. I had read this book before, maybe 5 or 6 years ago thinking it would help me get over all the failed relationship attempts. After that time however I kept falling into the same patterns, like the same old crap only with different guys. About 2 years ago I decided to start practicing absinence, in correlation with my renewed faith and dedication to God, and of course in response to repeatedly failed relationship attempts. Since this time I have been able to focus on myself as an individual, reflecting on many areas of my life and how to improve them through a renewed thankful and positive attitude towards nearly everyone I encountered.
Regardless of whether you are in a relationship, you must never lose sight of yourself as an individual or stop doing the things you enjoy, that make you who you are. Likewise you must respect your partner (the same goes for friends and family) to allow them to continue to be themselves without constricting their lifestyles. Except of course if they are involved in anything illegal or leading to acts of infidelity, but this may also be a reflection of their dissatisfaction with your expectations. To try and change or control another person or project past relationship hurts onto them does not work, it only leads to more hurt. This is the key to mastering the art of relationship, and maintaining a healthy balanced life. Enter each new relationship with a positive attitude of appreciation and keep your communication open and honest, so as to not be haunted by past ghosts - that probably don't have anything to do with the new person anyway! We can only learn and become stronger from our past mistakes, and move forward in perfect peace towards a positive future. After all, you deserve the BEST, forget about the rest.
posted by :: Lisa :: at 2:34 PM
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